Wednesday, February 18, 2009
I can't go...
Sean and a few of his friends are planning a trip to the movies, I tell him he can go but I want to know what parent is going to be there with them. He says he's not sure but it won't be me. I ask him why and he says because his friends think I'm weird. Weird I say, they don't even know me! I told them about you he says. So of course I have to ask "what did you tell them to make them think I'm weird?" "I told them you watch Hannah Montana and you're racist with your M&M's." GEEZ!
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Ian's first dance
This was such a positive experience for Ian and for me I just have to share. I've been trying to get Ian to go to a stake dance (with church) for almost a year now, he always says no and I can't dance. The other young men at church have tried to tell him how much fun it is, but he just didn't want anything to do with it. Last Wednesday after scouts the young men and young women (you know what a smile from a girl can do) convinced him he should go.
Saturday afternoon came around and I think nerves got the best of him and once again I'm hearing "I don't want to go". We had a mom to son talk, I told him I understood he was nervous and how everything is scary until you give it a try. I suggested he watch others fast dance and just copy what they did until he figures out his own style. I showed him how beginners slow danced-this was particularly funny because he had to look out the window first to make sure no one would see. I also through out the option of not dancing just "hanging out".
Still not clearly convinced he wanted to be there I took him over to the stake center. I asked him if he wanted me to go in with him, he said "no I can do it". I was so proud of him, I knew he was nervous and neither of us knew if anyone he knew was there yet. At 10:00 I went to pick him up. He was so happy! He talked all the way home (the endless talking he did get from me). He had such a good time, he danced with three girls, he couldn't wait until the next dance. I thought my heart would burst. I am so thankful that he had such a good time and that I was the one to pick him up AND that he shared his feelings with me.
Saturday afternoon came around and I think nerves got the best of him and once again I'm hearing "I don't want to go". We had a mom to son talk, I told him I understood he was nervous and how everything is scary until you give it a try. I suggested he watch others fast dance and just copy what they did until he figures out his own style. I showed him how beginners slow danced-this was particularly funny because he had to look out the window first to make sure no one would see. I also through out the option of not dancing just "hanging out".
Still not clearly convinced he wanted to be there I took him over to the stake center. I asked him if he wanted me to go in with him, he said "no I can do it". I was so proud of him, I knew he was nervous and neither of us knew if anyone he knew was there yet. At 10:00 I went to pick him up. He was so happy! He talked all the way home (the endless talking he did get from me). He had such a good time, he danced with three girls, he couldn't wait until the next dance. I thought my heart would burst. I am so thankful that he had such a good time and that I was the one to pick him up AND that he shared his feelings with me.
Sean on cooking
Sean has really taken an interested in cooking lately, a fact that makes me pretty happy, it would be nice to have someone in this house that can cook. :-) This afternoon on the way home from church Sean explained to me why he liked cooking:
- It's like science; you get to experiment
- It has math; you have to figure out how much to make.
- You get a reward at the end because you have something good to eat.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Friday, January 30, 2009
The Paradoxical Commandments by Dr. Kent M. Keith
1. People are illogical, unreasonable and self-centered (including me). Love them anyway.
2. If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Do good anyway.
3. If you are successful, you win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway.
4. The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.
5. Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable. Be honest and frank anyway.
6. The biggest people with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the littlest people with the littlest ideas. Think big anyway.
7. People favor underdogs, but follow only top dogs. Fight for a few underdogs anyway.
8. What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. Build anyway.
9. People really need help, but may attack you if you do help them. Help them anyway.
10. Give the world the best you have and you will get kicked in the teeth. Give the best you have anyway.
2. If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Do good anyway.
3. If you are successful, you win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway.
4. The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.
5. Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable. Be honest and frank anyway.
6. The biggest people with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the littlest people with the littlest ideas. Think big anyway.
7. People favor underdogs, but follow only top dogs. Fight for a few underdogs anyway.
8. What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. Build anyway.
9. People really need help, but may attack you if you do help them. Help them anyway.
10. Give the world the best you have and you will get kicked in the teeth. Give the best you have anyway.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Music
Have you ever been driving and a song comes on the radio that suddenly transports you to a different time and place? This afternoon on the way to an appointment I heard a Bob Seger song, suddenly I'm a teenager on a warm summers night, the nostalgia is so strong you'd swear you could touch that time again.
When I hear certain Jackson Brown songs, anything by Dan Fogelberg, and "Desperado" by the Eagles, it reminds me of someone I love but can't be with.
When I hear the song "Footloose", I must dance. When I hear "We will rock you", I must clap and sign along.
When I hear Lee Greenwood sing "I'm proud to be an American", I AM proud to be an American, where at least I know I'm free...
"Christmas Shoes" will make me cry no matter how many times I hear it.
In Church when we sing "I stand all Amazed", or when the primary and the teachers do "A child's prayer" I think my heart will explode with this feeling of truth, understanding, and gratefulness.
And when I hear "Jesus take the Wheel", I'm reminded where to look for guidance when I just can't do it all myself.
When I hear certain Jackson Brown songs, anything by Dan Fogelberg, and "Desperado" by the Eagles, it reminds me of someone I love but can't be with.
When I hear the song "Footloose", I must dance. When I hear "We will rock you", I must clap and sign along.
When I hear Lee Greenwood sing "I'm proud to be an American", I AM proud to be an American, where at least I know I'm free...
"Christmas Shoes" will make me cry no matter how many times I hear it.
In Church when we sing "I stand all Amazed", or when the primary and the teachers do "A child's prayer" I think my heart will explode with this feeling of truth, understanding, and gratefulness.
And when I hear "Jesus take the Wheel", I'm reminded where to look for guidance when I just can't do it all myself.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Makes me laugh
I got this silly thing for Ian-Sean got a similar one-I have no idea what it's saying, but for some reason it makes me laugh!
What I REALLY got for Christmas
The boys got me this throw, its warm and cozy! It has a pocket on the front (not sure what you put in it) with my name on it, and a pocket for your feet at the bottom. I tried to find a tag to see where it was made... couldn't find one. I don't think it was Pakistan though!
Our Christmas tree
The star on top Ian and I made together when he was about three or four- card board and aluminum foil. We had a little trouble with the star shape, but made good memories none the less. Ian suggested he and Sean and I make a new one next year, I think we just might do that.
Thursday, January 1, 2009
Invisible Mother
It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you see I'm on the phone?' Obviously not; no one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweepingthe floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all. I'm invisible. The invisible Mom. Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more! Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this?? Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, 'What time is it?' I'm a satellite guide to answer, 'What number is the Disney Channel?' I'm a car to order, 'Right around 5:30, please.' I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history and the mind that graduated summa cum laude -but now, they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's going, she's going, she's gone!?
One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England. Janice had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself. I was feeling pretty pathetic, when Janice turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, 'I brought you this.' It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe. I wasn't exactly sure why she’d given it to me until I read her inscription: 'To Charlotte, with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees.' In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could pattern my work: No one can say who built the great cathedrals - we have no record of their names. These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished. They made great sacrifices and expected no credit. The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything. A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, 'Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof, No one will ever see it. And the workman replied, ’Because God sees.' I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, 'I see you, Charlotte. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does. No act of kindness you’ve done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become.
At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a disease that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride. I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on. The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our life time because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree. When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, 'My Mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for 3 hours and presses all the linens for the table.' That would mean I'd built a shrine or a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, to add, ’You’re gonna love it there.' As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.
One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England. Janice had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself. I was feeling pretty pathetic, when Janice turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, 'I brought you this.' It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe. I wasn't exactly sure why she’d given it to me until I read her inscription: 'To Charlotte, with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees.' In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could pattern my work: No one can say who built the great cathedrals - we have no record of their names. These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished. They made great sacrifices and expected no credit. The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything. A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, 'Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof, No one will ever see it. And the workman replied, ’Because God sees.' I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, 'I see you, Charlotte. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does. No act of kindness you’ve done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become.
At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a disease that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride. I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on. The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our life time because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree. When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, 'My Mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for 3 hours and presses all the linens for the table.' That would mean I'd built a shrine or a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, to add, ’You’re gonna love it there.' As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Christmas Gift
Recent conversation between Ian, Sean and I:
Sean: Mom at insights Mrs. Carl showed us a web sight for a man that makes catapults, can I buy one with my money?
Mom: You need to wait until after Christmas to buy anything for yourself, and besides you should be spending your money on a Christmas present for me. (Sometimes you have to give them a reminder.)
Ian: We already got you a present.
Mom: You already got me a present? Your dad took you to get me a present? Already? (I must have said this three or four times.)
Ian: Yep, we got you an exploding bra.
Sean: It was made in Pakistan.
Sean: Mom at insights Mrs. Carl showed us a web sight for a man that makes catapults, can I buy one with my money?
Mom: You need to wait until after Christmas to buy anything for yourself, and besides you should be spending your money on a Christmas present for me. (Sometimes you have to give them a reminder.)
Ian: We already got you a present.
Mom: You already got me a present? Your dad took you to get me a present? Already? (I must have said this three or four times.)
Ian: Yep, we got you an exploding bra.
Sean: It was made in Pakistan.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Monday, December 8, 2008
Thank God for kids
I can't say that Christmas is my favorite holiday, it's always so busy, and we seem to forget the real meaning of CHRISTmas... but I do like the music. Sometimes the words just touch my heart and for a moment I feel the peace and joy this season is meant to bring. This song is an oldie-but I love the message.
After listening to this song again this morning, I had to smile at the "Big Bird and Mickey Mouse" part. What would it be today? Bob the builder and Dora the explorer perhaps? Kool aid on the couch...that never changes!
After listening to this song again this morning, I had to smile at the "Big Bird and Mickey Mouse" part. What would it be today? Bob the builder and Dora the explorer perhaps? Kool aid on the couch...that never changes!
Smart kid
The Lansing School district has something they call "ABBIT"-A's and B's because I try. They recognize 4th & 5th graders that got all A's and B's each marking period. This is Sean's third time. Way to go Sean! Mom's proud of you!Family Turkey
Ian's English teacher gave him a project: decorate the pre-drawn turkey with your family. Use things you have around the house. This type of project is right up my alley, I love this stuff. The family project ended up being mostly me, with a little input from Ian. I don't know if you can see this part or not, but the feet just have some little colored spots-they were m&m's. It seems the kids at school picked them off and ate them. Notice the little silver puff ball eye? That's the third one, one of the cats (or maybe all three) found them fun and they kept disappearing. I ended up taking the completed project over to the school and asked the teacher what the purpose of the project was-I mean it was English, not art. (On a side note, I learned they don't even have art at Ian's middle school this year. Stupid budget cuts!) She said she tries to do something like this once a quarter, the goal is to have the family work together. Families are so busy these days they don't talk anymore. She hopes these types of projects will get them to spend some quality time together. What a wonderful teacher!
OK
I've been a little negligent in my blog posting lately, things kind of got away from me for awhile there. I had a minor emotional melt down turning 50, how does someone get this old anyway? I distinctly remember saying I would never be so old. So I went through a little "woe is me" stint. Then some wonderful people thought I was lying to them about it, "no it can't be! I thought you were 35 or 40", God love 'em! And then I stared to think about how blessed I was and God willing I'll have another 30-40 years to do the things I still want to do. Life is good.
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